If you are not part of the solution you are part of the problem.

Well it is another of those – bing wide awake mornings.  With this Ketogenic Diet and all the drugs constipation is a constant concern so one of the ways to battle that little problem is to drink an enormous volume of water.  From the time I wake up I literally pee every hour on the hour so it is almost impossible to make it through the night without having to make a trip to the restroom.  This often results in me wanting more water so a trip to the kitchen for yet another glass and the cycle resumes.  Because of my late night wanderings, and all ambient light, I am left more awake than sleepy and thus toss and turn once I have returned to the bed.  Tonight (well this morning really) was even worse as I was really mad at myself and I could not let it go.  Now I have fodder for another post.

Last night we went to Portland Brewing for the weekly Geeks Who Drink trivia night.  It is held there every Saturday at 7pm.  Portland Brewing will also do something pretty cool and will allow fundraising events where they will donate portions of the bill to some worthy cause.  Last night was a fundraiser for the National Brain Tumor Society and seeing how I have a brain tumor Jessie thought we should go.  (and to be honest we like beer, even though I cannot drink we feel pretty at home in a brewery and I miss them)

Jeff, Jessie, Frank, and myself went as representatives of Team Food Baby.  The host did a good job mentioning this was a fundraiser in conjunction with the standard trivia night.  There was a representative from the National Brain Tumor Society (NBTS) and she said a few words, gave some facts and figures, and we started in with the trivia.  Once the game ended and the waitress came by with the bill Jessie mentioned something to the waitress about the fundraiser.  The waitress said I am glad you mentioned that as we need the customer to say something to apply the donation to the charity.  I thought seeing how this was a “fundraiser” that all that would have been arranged in advance so I went and asked the rep from the NBTS if we had to specifically say something to the staff.  She said that was a good point and would say something about it to the group.

The whole time I was there I did not see anyone that appeared to be there due to a brain tumor and felt like I should say something.  This is part of my general struggle with my situation.  Do I get involved? How much? To what level? And why? I am sort of a private person and like to keep things to myself and not be a martyr or a hey look at me I have this horrible thing and I want to make you look at it and make you uncomfortable because of it and guilt you into doing something you don’t want to do because of me and my thing.  I never liked it when others did that to me.  Frank said something to me this week as I expressed my confliction about my situation and he said, in general, if you are not part of the solution you are part of the problem.  I felt compelled to stand up last night and help drive the point home that Brain Tumor suck and they can happen to anyone and implore those people to help out by tossing a few bucks into the kitty.  Did I do it? Nope and that is what bothers me.  Why didn’t I?

And that is why I was tossing and turning all morning.  I am not shy; I don’t have a problem talking in front of a bunch of people.  I have a good story to tell so why didn’t get up and say something.  I am sure we could have gotten a few bucks more.  Brain tumors are so rare and the numbers pretty low they did not get much attention a few years ago thus research is way behind.  I had an opportunity to help out and I did not take it.  I consider myself very lucky as I have not been debilitated (yet) from this disease and many people are.  I need to take advantage of my good fortune while I can and do what I can.  I will not make that mistake again and will work hard to be an active participant in this fight to find a cure.

It’s good to have a cause right?

So, those of you that are seeing this on facebook, can you do what a couple of my friends did and share in your feed, the link our team page, and say: Hey a friend of mine is in a shitty situation and there needs to be more research into brain tumors.  Cut into Starbucks (or Budweiser or Coors it’s shitty beer anyway) profit and skip that coffee (beer) this week and send some cash to fund brain tumor research.  You might just make a difference.



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